Dave Blodgett

In the middle of the night I am dreaming. I have to pee. I get up, go to the bathroom, take out my tiny penis and pee. I wake up in a puddle of urine that soaks the sheets of my narrow bed.

I burst into tears. My Mother comes running, switches on the light and cradles me in her arms. I feel the warmth and softness of her bosom.

“There, there. Don’t cry. You had an accident.”

She takes the urine soaked, stinky sheets off and tucks me into fresh, clean sheets.

My kid brother, alarmed and rudely awakened is angry. “Davy, did you wet your bed again?” All this ruckus rouses my three older sisters in the adjoining bedroom.

The only person who snores on is Dad. He eschews any responsibility for child rearing or housework of any kind. That’s women’s work.

Primary functional enuresis—bed wetting—is the single most powerful independent variable shaping my lifelong character and behavior, accounts for my extremely low self-esteem, introversion, shyness and self-denigration and cripples me with a multitude of phobias that make life almost unbearable. I don’t dare speak in public (glossophobia), am terrified when I have to put something in writing (graphophobia), know that I am going to fail however hard I try (atychiphoia), am scared to death of Frankenstein’s Monster (bogyphobia), fear going to bed because of recurring nightmares (clinophobia), am really afraid of my desktop computer (cyberphobia), can’t express my opinions on controversial subjects (doxophobia), am tongue-tied and unable to express myself (laliophobia), fear death (necrophobia) and poverty (peniaphobia) and most of all fear all my phobias (phobophobia).

In the 1920s all kinds of myths were associated with bed-wetting. Guilt feelings prevailed. Bed-wetting was seen as punishment for misbehavior. Today we know better. Post nocturnal enuresis (PNE) is caused by physical and physiologic factors, not stress, poor self-esteem or emotional immaturity. Today, some medications help overcome PNE—Imipramine and Desmpressin acetate may help. More effective are retention control training where the child is asked to control urination by postponing it to increase bladder capacity and strengthen the muscle that holds the urine back. Night-lifting is effective. Waking the child periodically throughout the night and walking him to the bathroom many times. Moisture alarms can cure PNE. When the child begins to pee, an alarm is set off, wakes the child, sends him to the bathroom and then back to sleep. Finally, hypnosis is being used to re-program the brain so the child will respond to a full bladder while asleep the same as when awake.

Unfortunately, none of these cures were available in the1920s for poor little me. PNE shattered my dream of becoming a well-integrated, creative person comfortable with himself and phobia free. PNE is a choking albatross I shall carry to my grave.